one two three fourrrrnication!
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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