He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
It's official drugs can't kill me
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
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