69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
