Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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