he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
