what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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