I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
