dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
