But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
How external is "for external use only"?
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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