Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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