90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Randomize