did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
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