What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Randomize