i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
