Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
