I'm gonna have a badass scar
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
