I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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