thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
