i jhust puked up my retainher.
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
We talked him into tasing himself.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Randomize