Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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