sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Randomize
