Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
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