her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize