Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
