I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
