Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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