Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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