I'm drive I can fine osifer
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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