she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
