He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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