i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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