Sponge bath it is.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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