Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
