no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God gave him joint rollers for hands
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize