I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms