So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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