its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Did I show you my penis last night?
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS