You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Randomize