After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
