: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
