i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
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we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
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I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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