Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize