saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
