youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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