I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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