I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Randomize
