at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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