What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
