I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
