last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Randomize