My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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