She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
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