This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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