I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Randomize
