no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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