Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
