Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
